Dream a lil dream with me...

I was in a building from my past,

trying to go to sleep. Tryed to make my self comfortable but couldnt because i just couldnt seem to get the angle of the fan right. No matter how many times i tried. That should have been my hint.



I happened uppon an old phone, wich also happened to be fully charged.

He called me asking where i was, that he was near my old house and wanted to see me.

In attempting to give dirrections, i only failed a-hand-full-of-times.

My father was there, so i gave him the phone

only for him to arrive shortly after.


We fixed up. We laughed, talked about the oh- so -common things in life.

meandering in the hot Texas heat

stumbling about

in dirrections we both knew where too scary to actually open our eyes for

...cowards.


This is my idea of fun.


~Enter jesse gonzales and Desiree Martinez, from only God knows where.

They ask if we would like a puff of some better. Im also asked to roll it up.

I try to coax my hands into doing the deed, only to feel as if I have never done this before. That some past life years ago somehow is responsible for me even attempting to do something that now seems so foreign.

Needless to say this "dream" is full of me failing beautifuly, over and over.


Manipulating my imaginary experiences in a dream environment is only fun untill i nolonger

hold the reigns, So is this a lucid dream if i can controll some things in it, only to lose that same controll

a few moments after?

Can it be that the beta-1 frequency pulsating through the parental lobes in my brain is suddenly stopped?


They say the Devil you know is better than the Devil you dont...


At this point in the early morning, before the sun rises before the birds start to sing

when all you can hear is the early morning traffic and toilets flushing in the unit above you.

I think of how I miss him so-

and the reasons why he haunts my dreams...

What happens to me durring the day that i am subconsiously implanting him in my head?

Can i even be the one to blame?

Im not sure of today just as sure as I am not of tomorrow


Listen not to the ramblings of a man whos cast into the outter darkness for we know what resides there.

solitude,

weeping,

and the gnashing of teeth...